I’m Trying Not To Be A Bubba…but…

Sometimes you just don’t fit in. That happened this afternoon when I tried to run into the hotel restaurant for a quick lunch. It was a fine restaurant I’m sure. I am equally as sure that it has never served grits with red-eye gravy and I know they don’t serve sweet tea. Of course I discovered none of the fine culture until I  had wedged myself into a non fat-friendly booth.

However, I did discover an illustration that I will share with you. The illustrated truth is that just because something looks good doesn’t mean it will taste good! Here’s the story.

Since a tomato sandwich was not on the menu I opted for the quick three course lunch. In southern boy terms it was a salad, baked fish and ice cream for desert. The menu had different names but that is what it boiled down to.

My waiter brought the salad first. It was a neatly stacked pile of lettuce and cucumbers with an unnamed dressing, some sunflower seeds and 6 or 8 bean sprouts (who eats those things anyway). The pile was about the size of a grapefruit and full of color. The cucumber was sliced so thin you could see through it. It was presented on one of those fine pieces of china on a square plate. Sensing my bubbadom the waiter took away all the silverware except the proper fork with which I was to eat.

I’m just thinking that something that looks this good has to taste good. Wrong! The dressing was too oily and the lettuce was very bitter. The sunflower seeds were good but those pesky bean sprouts kept getting stuck between my teeth. I have a Swiss Army Knife with a built-in toothpick but decided not to use it.

Next came the baked Atlantic Monkfish. Again, it looked good (would have looked better with that golden fried look) but I was deceived. Baked fish is supposed to be light not chewy. The idea of chewing my way through fish is not appealing.

They did bring me some bread. Sweet rolls, which were not sweet at all and the cutest little cornbread squares I’ve ever seen. Got news for them, a hoecake from a iron skillet will win every time! They also brought some spread for  the bread. Served in little tiny skillets I had pure butter and lima bean puree. I can think of many things to do with limas…puree is not one of them. But it did look awfully nice.

Finally the ice cream. It arrived in a square bowl which sat at an angle in a slightly larger square bowl give a star-like look. It did not look good. Off white with no other color it was about the same tint as the lima mush. On the menu it was a Green Apple Sorbet. It was wonderful! I can still taste it. Just the right amount of a tang. Wow!

Here’s the point. You can’t always tell by looking at something if it is good or bad. I am glad God doesn’t do it that way ( 1 Samuel 16:7).

By the way…there’s a McDonald’s across the street. I hear they cater to Bubbas.